Last week I quietly turned 40. I let go of all the voices, internal and external, telling me I ‘should’ make a big deal out of it; I ‘should’ have a big party. I spent the day quietly, at the beach, with my partner, sometimes talking about our future, sometimes just sitting in the sun…And it was perfect. 

I thought it would be fun to write a ‘40 Things I’ve Learned in 40 Years’-style post, inspired by something I saw Marybeth Bonfiglio write a while back, which I believe was inspired by another woman friend of hers.  But I can’t find that post right now, so…sorry!

Here goes:

1. Love really does win.
2. You will never regret the time you spend with your children.
3. Money can’t buy happiness.  Money can’t buy freedom.  Money can’t buy spaciousness.  Happiness, freedom & spaciousness are created from within.  You can create them when you have very little money & you can create them when you have a lot of money.  But it’s up to you to create them, regardless of your financial circumstances.
4. There is almost nothing that a walk in the woods {or sitting under the stars at night, or standing with your feet in the ocean} won’t ease.
5. There are so many good & decent people in the world.  Without naivety, or spiritual bypassing – focus on that.
6. I don’t want to live in a world without art.
7. Breath.  Breath is the key to everything.
8. The risks I’ve taken for love have all been worth it.  
9. I have never regretted going into debt in service of my family or my dreams.
10. One foot in front of the other.  Forever.
11. Drink more water.
12. Go to bed earl{ier}.
13. Always speak up for what you believe in.  It may be scary in the moment, and {honestly} you may lose ‘friends’ or prestige in the process, but you will sleep better at night.
14. It’s OK to not know.
15. It’s OK to change your mind.
16. It’s OK to make mistakes.
17. You don’t have to stick with a mistake, just because you spent a lot of time {or money} making it.
18. Women:  Trust your body.
19. Men:  Trust her body.
20. Everyone:  Listen {more}.
21. Everything becomes eas{ier} when we fall in love with doing hard things.
22. It’s OK for it to be easy.
23. I believe it is our Joy that will save us.
24. I know this to be true:  We all come from the same Source from which came the entire universe.  The same mysterious spark that birthed the cosmos, is the spark of life in you.
25. Let the people in your life love you.  Actively notice all the ways the people in your life are already trying to love you.  And let it in.
26. Stop waiting {for anything} to begin living how you want to live. Right now.  In this moment.  How do you want to feel?  Find that place inside yourself, where that exists already.  Now breathe into that place & allow it to expand, simply with your breath & your awareness.  Now take one action from that place.  Every day.  For the rest of your life.
27. It is a radical act to be willing to feel good.
28. Just because you don’t feel good, doesn’t mean anything is wrong.
29. Being cool is overrated.
30. Sometimes it is way more important to take your kids to the beach way past their bedtime, than for everyone to be well-rested the next day.
31. Ask for help {more}.
32. Stop acting from Habit & calling it Authenticity.
33. The most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself.  
34. The most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself.  Yes, I know I repeated myself.  You didn’t really listen the first time.
35. Every once in a while:  Scroll through your own FB photos, so you can be jealous of your own ‘perfect life’.
36. Don’t worry about getting rid of your fears & ‘limiting beliefs’ – just don’t act on them.
37. My life had expanded in direct proportion to my willingness to BE in the midst of feeling uncomfortable.
38. Disagreeing with someone doesn’t mean you don’t love them.  Same goes for other people disagreeing with you.
39. Your {real & deep & true} connection with the Earth will give you everything – everything – you ever need.
40. “If you cannot make something better or different, then make it Holy.” Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes  Bless this moment.  And this one.  And this one too….